Every Asian person with a blog has a post dedicated to how their parents never said, “I love you.” Is it a vicious racial stereotype if it has an almost 100% actual observance rate…? It remains a mystery why Asians specifically are so inept at expressing familial love. Maybe it has something to do with war-related trauma. But Spain has been involved in a ton of wars and Spanish people kiss their family members ON THE MOUTH.
– Jeffrey
What I find interesting are the behaviors that take the place of those actual words. For my family, the substitute has always been dumplings. Dumplings were on the table for every birthday and special occasion. Dumplings were on the little altar in the corner of our formal living room on the anniversary of every grandparents’ passing. We even made dumplings for the opening ceremony of the 2008 Beijing Olympics because it was a big night for Chinese people generally, as if to say, “I love you, my people.”
Perhaps it is more noble to provide your loved ones with something tangible and nourishing than utter a few words. Especially in the era before stand-mixers and pre-made wrappers, dumplings required a level of effort that somebody who wasn’t devoted to you wouldn’t bother to endeavor. Even so, the emotional range of a dumpling is limited and emotional expressions by proxy always left something to be desired. There were times growing up, after particularly bad arguments, when a few dumplings on a plate couldn’t take the place of the words we couldn’t bring ourselves to say.
As my parents have gotten older. I have noticed them sneaking in an “I love you” mid hang-up after a Facetime call or as they are driving away after dropping me off at the airport. It always feels like a director is going to jump up out of nowhere and yell, “CUT! Ok ‘parents’… it’s not feeling natural. Let’s stick to the script please…” I’m not sure where it’s coming from — maybe they feel a sense of guilt about the past, maybe they accidentally watched all 11 seasons of Modern Family because they didn’t know how to change the channel. After all this time, I wonder if it’s too late to fundamentally change the family dynamic. Our relationship is so complicated, a thicket of intertwined underlying issues, many we have yet to acknowledge let alone resolve. Right now, I still don’t think any of us are ready for those words. But in the meantime, I have an amazing dumpling recipe.
Preparation time: 30 minutes | Cook time: 10 minutes | Total cook time: 40 minutes
Ingredients
For the filling
- 1 pound of ground pork
- 2 cups of chopped napa cabbage
- 2 tablespoons chopped green onion
- 1 tablespoon chopped ginger
- 2 tablespoons soy sauce
- 1 tablespoon shao xing wine
- 1 tablespoon sesame oil
- 1 teaspoon cornstarch
For the dumplings
- Northern style dumpling wrappers
- Small bowl of water
Directions
Combine the filling ingredients starting with the ground pork and the seasonings (soy sauce, shao xing wine, sesame oil, and corn starch). Try to mix in one direction until the filling takes on a smoother, paste-like quality (if the meat was very cold, this will take a little bit longer). Once it’s ready, add the napa cabbage, green onions, and ginger and mix until well incorporated.
Place ~1 tablespoon of filling into the center of each wrapper. Try not to get any filling mixture onto the edges as that will diminish the strength of the seal later on. Dab your finger in some water and wet the inside edge of the top half of the wrapper. Fold the bottom half edge (dry) toward the top half edge (wet) and press together firmly to create a half moon type shape. Bonus points for pleats: add 2-3 small folds going in the same direction on the top half edge (wet) before bringing the sides together. This will give the dumpling it’s signature rounded look. This amount of filling is enough for 30-40 dumplings, depending on how much you’re able to stuff into each one. I recommend under-filling for beginners to ensure each dumpling is sealed properly.
Bring a large pot filled 3/4 of the way with water to a rolling boil. Drop the dumplings in (max 15-20 at a time) and immediately give it one comprehensive stir to prevent sticking to the bottom of the pot / each other. Once the dumplings float, cook for 2 additional minutes and then fish them out and enjoy with a dipping sauce or in some hot & sour soup (pictured).