I can never see the words “sticky rice” without thinking about the time somebody told me that it’s a euphemism for gay Asians who only date other gay Asians. I assume it was a natural extension of the term “rice queen” — another euphemism but for gay whites who only date gay Asians. I think it’s pretty telling that the white gays get to be “queens” and Asian gays are relegated to being miniscule, indistinguishable grains of rice…
– jeffrey
There is actually a lot of commentary around white/Asian couples, of the straight variety, these days. Any video on TikTok featuring a white man and an Asian woman (they are literally inescapable) will inevitably receive a few “Oxford Study” comments, a sarcastic quip about a research paper examining “Normative Assumptions of White Male and Asian Female Relationships.” Honestly, lol. People on the internet can be so funny sometimes.
I get how, from the perspective of the aspiring-influencer-Asian-girlfriend-trying-to-mine-fame-through-staged-interactions-with-a-boyfriend, that these comments can be frustrating in the way they derail the manicured image of a perfect relationship. But dismissing the criticism outright as trolling from incels and racists is a little bit lazy. Receiving a negative comment on the video you posted of your wedding on Lake Como is not exactly Loving vs. the State of Virginia.
Well, if they won’t perform any introspection, I’ll introspect for them. There was an Asian female influencer who said in an interview, “I think Asian men just remind me of my dad or my brother, which I can’t associate with romance.” I think this rationale is just weird… humans have been able to separate the two since time immemorial. Not sure why suddenly, in the era pickleball, it has become more difficult. There was another Asian female influencer who made a video about how, “When I’m with my [white] boyfriend, I get treated better for some reason.” I think this woman is actually very close to inadvertently understanding her own heart, which is beautiful.
It’s fairly easy to see what dynamics are at play here. White men generally hold power, stature, and wealth in our society. Asian women are shrewd enough to understand that dating them is one path toward achieving it for themselves; and that’s ok! But other minority groups want the same general acceptance from society and upward mobility… it just feels harder for them to grasp at it. So I guess jealousy is what they’re left with; and that’s a valid feeling too.
Preparation time: 30 minutes | Cook time: 20 minutes | Total cook time: 50 minutes
Ingredients
- 2 Taiwanese sausage links
- 1/4 lb. dried pork belly (optional)
- 2 tablespoons dried shrimp (optional)
- 4 dried scallops (optional)
- 4 shitake mushrooms
- 2 large shallots
- 1 tablespoon vegetable oil
- 3 cups sticky rice (“sweet glutinous rice”) – soaked for 6 hours or overnight
- 1 tablespoon soy sauce
- 1 tablespoon oyster sauce
- 1 tablespoon shao xing wine
- 1 teaspoon five spice powder
- 1 teaspoon sugar
- 1/4 cup chopped cilantro
Soak the shitake mushrooms, dried shrimp, and dried scallops in hot water to reconstitute them (~30 minutes). In the meantime, rinse the pre-soaked sticky rice and steam for ~15 minutes. You can use a rice cooker on a timer setting or steam in a colander placed inside a large pot of water (just make sure the water doesn’t touch the rice). Dice the sausage links and dried pork belly. If the pork belly has skin, I like to remove it because it generally stays pretty chewy even after cooking.
In a large wok, stir fry the sausage and pork belly in the vegetable oil until slightly crispy and some of the fat has rendered off. Add the shallots and fry for 5 minutes. Meanwhile, drain and dice the mushrooms, dried shrimp, and scallops and add as well. After 5 more minutes, add the five spice powder, soy sauce, oyster sauce, sugar, and shao xing wine and stir to incorporate. After another 5 minutes, add the steamed sticky rice. Fold the ingredients into the rice thoroughly so each grain of rice is coated with the sauce mixture and everything is distributed evenly. Serve with a generous sprinkling of cilantro on top.